3 DIY Ideas for Teen Room Makeovers | Raising Independent Teens | Parenting With Love and Logic

3 Must Try DIY Ideas for Teen Room Makeovers

Welcome back to today’s episode of My Teen Daughter is Driving Me to Drink. I’m your host Selena “Don’t You Sass Me” Cochran. And today, we’d like to welcome three very special guests to the show. Please give a warm studio welcome to “Yes I Heard You 10 Minutes Ago,” “Are We There Yet?” and “You Mean I Have to Wash My Own Dishes?”

Middle school and high school parents, I bet your special guest line ups are pretty similar to mine. I’ll have to write a post about some of the awesome one-liners teens and tweens come up with. But for today, let’s talk about simple, DIY bedroom makeovers for teens.

If we want our children to be shakers, movers and/or master change agents in the earth, we must create an atmosphere conducive to unbridled creativity, independence, discipline and freedom of expression. – Selena 

My daughter is quite creative, expressive and artistic. So when she originally told me her concept for the room, I was hesitant. It was a huge undertaking and frankly, “ain’t nobody had time for that!” Ha! Couldn’t resist. In the end, I couldn’t have been more proud of my princess! Eat your heart out Ty Pennington! Here are some of her best ideas for her room makeover:

Wall Decor 

“Mom, I want to be reminded about what’s really important to me.” Aside from the impromptu teary-eyed, mom’s-gone-all-mushy-in-public-again moment, I was a proud. She wanted words and phrases on her wall that reminded her of all that’s good in her life. We purchased silver-tinged wall décor with phrases like: friends are the flowers that bloom in life’s garden; go confidently in the direction of your dreams; and Wish It. Dream It. Do It.  A perfect compliment to her pink accent wall. You’ll find these at Kohl’s, Tarjay and the Dollar Store.

Glitter/Splatter/Paint 

“I want it to be funky but still be something unique only to me.” With those words, my genius daughter used glitter paint plus 3 other colors to create one heck of a spectacular splatter paint design for all of the trim and baseboards in her room. You definitely won’t find this type of splatter anywhere. Pink shag/satin curtains courtesy of Grandma. 

Bean Bag Chairs 

Photo Credit: BeanBagBoss.com

“Duh, mom. Every room should have a bean bag. Where else would Lovey sleep?” She may be 14 now but Lovey, the Dolphin, still needs a place to call home. And not just any old bean bag, but a black/white/pink leopard print bean bag. Why? Because dolphins are princesses too. True story.

Stop. Think. Do.

The key to raising our teens to be independent and brilliant is to provide an outlet for them to be themselves and support them as they do. The princess called all the shots and I graciously, and proudly, watched her create one stellar masterpiece of a room. I’m proud. She’s prouder. And that parents, is what it’s all about.

Top 3 Things Not to Do If Your Ex Acts Like a Toddler | Coping with Breakups | Successful Parenting

“Thanks so much for picking up the kids this week”

“Ahh, no problem. They’re my kids too.”

“Yeah, I know but work has been crazy this week and well, thank you.”

“Anytime. I love being invited to their games and what not.”

What Not To Do If the Ex Acts Like a Toddler | Successful Single Parenting

Sounds kind of dreamy, right? Sounds too good to be true doesn’t it? Actually, it’s not that farfetched. I know several divorced families where this is the standard flow of things which continues to leave me to starry-eyed and staring off into the distance fantasizing about a healthy, constructive dialogue with my ex. POP!!! Well, so much for fantasies. {snort}

Now, this is not a post about dogging out, belittling or degrading exes. Not only is that counter-productive; it’s destructive, especially to your child (ren). Here at SelenaSpeaks, we discuss positive practical ways to confront and manage difficult situations and in doing so, discover some truths about ourselves. My hope is that we’ll use those truths to make better decisions and choices in the future.

That said, let’s dive deeper. Let’s ruffle some feathers and enjoy a good chuckle, or two, in the process.

Thing #1 – Don’t Back Over ‘Em With Your Car

As you well know, I’m happily divorced. Like happily, happily divorced. Delirious in fact…which would explain a few things. If you’re like me then your ex doesn’t always **pause for dramatic flair** respond in a manner conducive to your emotional and mental well-being. I’m pretty sure you all know what I’m driving at. No matter how upsetting, annoying, frustrating or hurtful the conversation or interaction, responding at the height of your anger is NEVER a good idea nor is using violence to make your point. Silence can be your greatest weapon—use it often. Deep breaths and taking your time to respond not react, works wonders.

Thing #2 – Why Don’t Ya Shuddup Already?!! – Yeah. Don’t ask that.

Not that I’ve ever said those words…or anything similar. {nervous side eye glance} Much to your chagrin and possibly mine, shut-up really is a mean word. The trickiest thing about most “ex” situations is communication. Without it, you’re almost guaranteed a fail-FAIL every time. Unless the ex is using vulgar language, demeaning you or otherwise trying to manipulate or control you, hear him or her out completely. No, it’s not easy but respect is a two-way street.

Thing #3 – Don’t Play By My Rules? No Kids for You! – Don’t. Even. Go. There.

Remember the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld? If you didn’t speak, act or behave in a manner he wanted he’d retaliate by refusing to sell you soup and quickly dismiss you from the store. Hilarious as heck on TV, not even remotely funny in reality. Friends, children are not bargaining chips. They’re blessings—treasures—to be honored and valued, not things used to punish a parent for not doing what we feel or think is right. If your ex isn’t putting the children’s lives in danger, you don’t get to dictate if or when they get to see their children. But I’m not getting child support. But he refuses to help pay for their clothes and tuition. But all she does is leave the kids with her boyfriend. It’s ridiculous and it sucks; and I’m so sorry. But you can’t, ever. If you’re concerned for their welfare, then get the proper agencies involved. If the children don’t want to go, get the proper agencies involved. When my daughter was left in a park, alone for the better part of two hours, I got the proper people involved. Years later, when the ex petitioned the court and falsely accused me of violating his visitation rights, the proper agencies responded, the facts were reviewed and the petition was dismissed. Was it difficult listening to the lies in court?  Heck yea, I almost succumbed to thing #1. But the wonderful thing about lies is that the truth ALWAYS comes to light.

Stop. Think. Do.

Ladies and gents, in the words of Prince “act your age, not your shoe size.” Your ex may not always abide by those words but you can. An eye for an eye leaves the world blind. Using fire to fight fire will result in burns for everyone involved, especially your children. So, remember: think before you act, show a little respect and keep the children out of the drama.

Thanks for visiting!

Boob vs Bottle: A Funny Story About Honesty and Children

Boob or Bottle:  A  Funny Family  Take  on Honesty

“You fed us with your boob?!?”  Before we stroll down “anatomy” lane, I think proper introductions are in order. My name is Mommy and in case you haven’t picked up on it, I’m a mother. Not just any mother but the “bestest Mommy in the whole wide world.” That’s right: the bestest—well I used to be; but I’m getting ahead of myself. To fully appreciate the entirety of my fall from grace, we must return to the scene of the crime; to the night in question that resulted in the inevitable demise of my entire kingdom. I was tried, convicted and stripped of my royal title and for what? Honesty? Serving my subjects faithfully and dutifully? You be the judge.

It all began on a Wednesday. The time: 6:05pm. The theme: Family Fun Night. The place: bestest Mommy’s Headquarters aka the kitchen. The night began like any other:  lively board game fun, stimulating chatter about booties and boogers and of course the most popular attraction—food. Laid out in typical buffet fashion, our favorite family snacks decked the table: cheddar wheat chips, French onion dip, fresh yogurt parfait and a savory sampling of homemade goodies from bestest Mommy’s bakery.

For two hours, we ate together, laughed at each other and “trash talked” our way through typical fun night games: Tic Tac No He Cheated, Connect Six is too Better Than Four and the ever favorite U(no) You Can’t Call that Before I Put My Card Down. Yes, family fun night was in full swing and fortunately for my aching head, it was coming to a close and Open Mic Night was just getting started; and yes, it works exactly how it sounds.

You get a mic, or in this case an inverted hair brush and you ask any question on any topic of your choosing. In return for steadfast audacity, you are guaranteed the Open Mic pledge: a 100% no fluff, no sugar coated, honest-to-God truthful answer (for audiences ten years and younger, of course).

With grace and expertise, I fielded life’s most hard-hitting questions: why did God give me a brother, why do grownups slobber when they kiss and the most difficult of them all will Optimus Prime be in heaven when I get there?  Each question was countered in typical kingdom fashion: a flawless execution. Bestest Mommy was here to stay and with the final question at hand, my reign would be solidified for another seven day term. I was certain that whatever it was, it didn’t stand a chance.

So, naturally when my daughter asked the question I didn’t flinch. I don’t even think I breathed or blinked. With everything on the line, I just couldn’t take the chance.

“So, Mommy tell us, when we were babies did you feed us with your boob or the bottle?” She could barely say the words without laughing hysterically. Apparently, boob is a much funnier word than I realized. Still, I was undeterred in my mission. My reign was at stake.

In confident display, I looked my daughter, and son, in the eye, erased the smile from my face and let the truth be known: “I fed you with the boob.” What happened next will go down as the single greatest upset in the history of woman.

“What?!? You fed us with your boob?!? Eww. That’s gross. What kind of mother does that?”

And with that, my long standing reign came to a screeching halt. Bestest Mommy was dethroned—indefinitely. I tried to spout off all the medical benefits of the boob: healthier babies, higher IQ’s, etc. I even played the “that’s what real mothers do” card. No offense to the bottle feeding mothers reading this story. I was desperate; not that it did me any good.

So, now I’m just Mommy. No title, no kingdom, just Mommy; and like many of you, I’m paying the price for being that kind of mother who even in the face of such grave opposition, does what’s in the best interest of her children. My only hope is that someday it’ll actually pay off.  Either that or I ask for a refund—not that it would do me any good. But a mother can hope, can’t she?

 

 

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